Football Terminology for Gardeners

In honor of today's sports activities, I thought I'd dust off this 

little piece I wrote to make watching the Superbowl a little more

 fun for those of us who play in the dirt in a different manner!

Enjoy!

Football Terminology for Gardeners

                                 By: Marcy Dailey                

February 2009

WIDE END – What the neighbors view when we’re weeding in the springtime

TIGHT END- What we’re sporting by the end of the season after all that stooping

TACKLE- Pruning the shrub roses

FIRST DOWN- Un-hooped peonies in a rainstorm

TOUCHDOWN- To get to the “root” of  it!

OUT OF BOUNDS- Mint- enough said!

HALFTIME- Halftime we can’t remember what we were going to do before we got distracted!

SAFETY- mosquito repellant, sunscreen, gloves, & a wide-brimmed hat

PERSONAL FOUL- When the deodorant gives out around mid-day in August

FIELD GOAL- To convert the soybeans to all native prairie plants

WIDE RECEIVER- The orifice on a good chipper/shredder

FLAG- A variety of Iris

PASS- What organic gardeners do with chemicals

PENALTY- Not having grocery money after spending it all on new plants

WINNING SEASON – 1” of rain per week, moderate temperatures, enough good bugs to counter the bad bugs, wildlife that remains in the wild, and ample money and time to devote to gardening.